Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Ode to the disillusioned

I am a single mom and receive no child support (yes it's being followed up on, but it's not an easy nor quick process), working two jobs to support us and build a new life. I drive a 15-year-old car (but it's a good one, regardless), have only a few debts (not nearly as many as most), and don't care for the more common social activities such as bars, etc.

Unfortunately, many men seem to be of the opinion that I should have founded my own Fortune 500 company and earning a six-figure income by now. It might happen to some, but my focus is inclined toward my children at this point, not on an MBA.

The bottom line is this: A good person of either gender is one who is always sincere (never phony or always saying the things they expect everyone else wants to hear - there's virtue in blatant honesty, people) as well as honest, devoted, respectful and faithful.

The only true unconditional love is that of God for all of us. Parents mess up, partners mess up, friends mess up, we all mess up. It's the way of human nature: we're all doomed to fail miserably at some point or another.

I think the biggest problems in failed relationships are these:

a) one or both of the parties is trying so hard to be "perfect" that they fail to be who they truly are

b) one or both of the parties expects the other to be perfect.

Never try to be something you are not. Nobody is capable of successfully becoming something that God did not create them to be. It doesn't matter how good an actor you are, or how many people you have fooled for however long. It all comes out in the wash.

If you're too ashamed of who you are to show your true nature to anyone else, it's time to remove yourself from the proverbial "market" and work on you before attempting to be with anyone else.

1 comment:

Tamir said...

Shanna, you're a very wise woman.